WINTER IS COMING

WINTERING

Had the good fortune to get to chat with Sorin last night (one of my hosts here) and he suggested a clever bit of lateral thinking.

I wish I could take credit for it but honestly, I didn't even come close to thinking of it.

From about September or October until April (when I want to be back in the USA), Europe sucks for the cold. Unless you have plenty of money and want to go to some rich people hang out like the south of France or Greece.

He suggested that I leave Europe early for somewhere else in North America. Spend time in the southern part then move north when it is time.

Later, I'm going to have to do some research on Mexico.

What a great scene!

Aside from 'Fun with Kidnappers' I am not sure how much it would actually cost to do Mexico. I remember it is a bit more expensive than other places in Central (nope!) and South America but they are almost guaranteed to have Mexican food.



ENCOUNTER

Exploring a town within Romania, a mother waited awkwardly for her son. Half hidden in the brush on a hillside he squatted, his bowels having taken him by surprise.

Three strides past the mother, stopping, turning and returning. She watches nervously as my bag is opened. A plastic small bundle is offered. She shakes her head. I glance at the child and offer it again. She takes it, realizing it is toilet paper, smiles.

Careful not to add to the embarrassment of the child by glancing his direction, my journey resumed, thoughts of similar within my own past - both distant and recent.



BREXIT - what's Logan's opinion?

Yes, believe it or not, I have had some Romanians ask me this.  Like I even know what country I'm in half the time.

First point:  The day after Brexit was voted 'lets leave the EU', the second most popular Google search term in the UK was 'what is the EU'.   Hilarious.   That is one of the funny sad things - like a clown falling into a wood chipper and his monkey turns it on.

Second point:  Logan thinks (may or may not be right) that much of it (Brexit) was about racism, nationalism and possibly some other -ism's.  Logan doesn't think much of people who like -ism's.  When the BPS (their money) went down to the lowest rate since 1985, I'm thinking "I wish I had more money so I could buy some of theirs".

Third point:  If the BPS dropped down to where it was 1 to 1 with the USD (who knows - Logan could get lucky and the UK taken with 'surprise buttsex') it would make an affordable vacation there for Logan.  Hell, I could even afford to get Matthew drunk.

Fourth point:  Enough people are now whining that they didn't know what the vote was for, didn't realize that their vote counted and wishing they could go back in time that I wonder if they will have another vote.  Keep voting till you get the result you want?

Last point:  Will one country leaving the EU cause the rest of them to fall out?  I doubt it.  I know a lot of people seem really paranoid about that but it makes you wonder what kind of idiots think that things that are together will always stay together.  Just because the USA has been around for 200 years, do I think it will be around forever?  That is ignorant.  If it survives another hundred (less if Trump is elected) that would be impressive.  Things fall apart and become other things.  That's just how it seems to work.



GOSH LOGAN, WHY ARE SOME COUNTRIES POOR?

The sad thing is that the beggar in this pic is dressed better than I do.  I'll have to steal his clothing later...

When a country is poor, there are usually reasons.  Fairly obvious ones.

Most often it is high levels of corruption coupled with low levels of education.  Anyone thinking politicians want educated voters haven't really figured out that stupid people count the same.  Sadly.

When I was in the USA, I worked in purchasing/supply chain/logistics for about a dozen (?) years.  Here's roughly how it works in the USA.  When you buy something in a store, it gets scanned.  In most countries, this tells the person how much you owe and computes the change they should give you - as otherwise they'd have no clue.  In the USA, it goes a step further and marks off unit(s) sold into a data base.  This data base also has levels for reordering - often automated.  When they get down to five units left, reorder.  One unit left, emergency rush reorder.

Because in the USA, businesses want your damn money.  As much of it as they can get.

Sadly, the same thing doesn't take place in non 'westernized' countries in the rest of the world.  If stock gets sold, it seems to rely on them going completely out of stock and a manager to eventually wander out of their office - possibly lost and confused - to see the gaping hole in the inventory before maybe thinking they should reorder that shit some day.

A lot of the behaviors I've seen in retail around the world would get you instantly fired in the USA.  Horsewhipped too, if they could get away with it.

And that's why - despite the heat - three stores don't carry mutherfucking fans.  That's right.  I asked where they were and when they would have them in.  They explained it has been hot and they sold out a week or two ago and they didn't know when they'd get more in.

I'm always thinking "With their business practices, how in the fuck do these stores stay open?  They have to pay rent, employees, utilities and so on."  In the USA I know they'd have closed long ago and the owners would be sitting around wondering what happened.  In much of the world, I suspect leprechauns (like my buddy Matthew L. who is an evil one) of using magic to keep these places open somehow.

Fucking fans.  It is like having rain for the last few weeks and everyone having been sold out of umbrellas for the last few weeks.  Then bitching they are fucking poor.  Yeah.  It must just be one of those strange things.  You know any leprechauns?



I'M A FAN

But for me change it to "A fan at last, a fan at last - thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster I have a fan at last."  Not to take away from the great MLK but I am very thankful to have at last found a fan.

I had wandered over to the big mall (via bus) and was traipsing around there when I came across a fan.  It's 35 cm across - not huge but enough and a floor model for 'easy to trip over' features.  Immediately grabbing it, I glared about to make sure hordes of no central air peasants were about to mob me for my prize.

None were.

I scarpered.

After arriving home and removing it from the box I was sad to discover that some bright spark had chosen to save less than a dollar in packaging by making it 'some assembly required'.  I looked at the multi-lingual instructions.

Nine languages and you mutherfuckers can't be bothered to do the 'international language'?  Really?

OK.  Got to put it together in French.  Hint - I used the pictures.  Downside - not many pictures.

But fortunately only a couple of pieces to put together.  Cool.

When staying at a friends house, going through all their shit looking for tools is not cool so I gave my buddy Sorin a call.  No tools at this house.  Maybe the people at the tattoo shop downstairs.

Stunned, I hung up.

This was a huge culture shock.

In the USA, if you don't have tools and materials to make your own trebuchet (add that word to my dictionary online - why doesn't it have it?) then how will you defend yourself in the upcoming zombie apocalypse?

If you can't build one of these from things lying around your dwelling, you aren't even seen as human among zombie survivalists.

Also, pretty much every household in the USA has tools.  In some, they are the male equivalent of the little delicate china figurines that some women collect; in other homes they are penis replacements.

If you remember this, you are either an old fucker or watch too many reruns.

In homes of henpecked men they are the simple justification for having a workshop somewhere on the property they can retreat to, leaving their shrew behind.

For some law enforcement officers, they are used in the hobby that keeps them from just executing everyone.

The real mystery is always how he gets the boats OUT.  I suspect a huge secret door and tunnel.

For some men, they are not used - just bought for display in case anyone wants to see if they are real men.

Who the hell is this and why is he in my blog and what is up with his hair and crazy look?  His appearance does remind me of one of my friends though.

Some men just get tools just to masturbate over.

And I would like to point out that for LGBT people (as that is a hot topic these days) I do not believe that confines them to the Hello Kitty tool set.

Though honestly if they are decent tools (and I had a fixed abode) I'd accept them as gifts, sure.  I really don't care what the tools look like.

So...  No tools.

Screw going downstairs until I had to.  Roll your jury rig skill!  Success!  You have found things you can temporarily use as tools!

The fan was assembled.

I'm really happy about it partially because I have been keeping the place pretty closed up.  They don't  have screens (for some unknowable reason) in Europe and every time I open a window mosquitoes come to visit.

After nearly dying from one biting me, I am a bit on the paranoid side.

The fan will remain here after I leave.  Since I will be here for a month for sure (probably two - they keep urging me to stay any time I ask if they have a place in mind I can go rent) the fan will be a nice 'thanks for letting me squat at your house' gift.



BOOK REVIEW

Review on the book "1632".

The title is descriptive as it is the year the book is set in and honestly, much more creative than many of the titles I've seen. If you can search for your title on Goodreads and find it a half dozen times, here's a hint: Try harder.

Anyway, the good, bad and ugly format.

The good: I like the stories where a stalwart band of Yanks (it's always yanks - apparently other nations just don't have the gumption to get sucked back in time) get sucked back in time (like the "Islands in the Sea of Time" series  ) to 'show them how it's done'.

The bad: Unlike pretty much every other time travel book out there, nobody seems to either care or even mention (in the first book, later it's mentioned and dismissed) the whole 'might we start a really fucked up paradox by not only marrying the locals but killing several of them, starting revolutions and introducing tech a few hundred years early? Nope. Nobody even thinks about it. Mind you, I don't think it would have changed anything. Being told "You know, we should destroy all our stuff and kill ourselves so we don't potentially cause a paradox" is not something that is going to go over big with too many crowds. But you'd think someone would at least mention, speculate or possibly even fret a bit about it. For half a page even... Another problem - sometimes the book starts to sound like a dull history textbook. Once they move away from what I think the interesting part of history is (history is the stories of individual often interesting people) and onto more abstract stuff (here is a discussion of the strategic military hard points that only a history nerd with a map could follow and nobody will actually give a shit about it), you feel like you are just wading through crap to get to the interesting parts.

The ugly: Holy shit, it's like the Game of Thrones stuff. Sure, there are some people who can keep track of characters that appear every now and then but there are so many of them you end up fixating on your favorites and feeling like you're just wading through the rest. It makes me with they'd trimmed down the cast of who the story is actually told through.

In summation - I'm into the second book (strangely named 1633 - didn't see that one coming, can't wait to see what the third book is named) right now. Looking back on the first - there is some interesting stuff but you have to do some wading to get to it. Sometimes fairly deep wading. Is it historically accurate? Probably more than I care about.

5/10. Decent but not sure if I'd go back and re-read it.

Follow up - I made it up to the third book before giving up.  Some good parts but just too much bullshit to wade through to get there.



PRICES

750ml bottle of Captain Morgan Spiced Rum, 60 lei

35cm fan - about 30-40 USD - not sure.

72 days to go!

Warning - insanity gotten from this blog may be both rampant and contagious.



CHATTING WITH BERT

He is a rock. In fact, I'd gush so far as to say "If you're ever in Blacksburg, VA, pick up a couple steaks and go pay him a visit - unless you're an excellent cook he will make them better and you can have a nice visit. PS: Don't bring alcohol."

Bert's pretty much happy to come in and take any and everything out of here that I don't. Food, shelving, tables, computer, etc. TJ - get here quick if you want those Cthulhu books - otherwise, Bert will get them after I split. It gives me great peace of mind that it just isn't all going to waste.



He's even willing to take what will be left of my prized Kool-Aid collection.


Now, Bert did offer to store stuff for me but to be honest, I am excited about cutting all of my worldly possession ties and getting out on the road. [Well, I tell a lie - I do have a couple hard drives he's going to hold on to for me.] Bert has given me a lot of peace of mind for my trip.


Something else that Bert suggested I look into:


This would be handy for not only recording game sessions if the netbook isn't up to it but it could be neat for walking around and doing podcasts in the interesting places I go to. I put one into my Amazon cart for 'maybe later'. I'm not sure how much of my money we're going to eat through in Western Europe and I don't want to buy anything I don't have to before I go. But it is possible.

Something else interesting - he had asked me if there was anyone I needed to keep in touch with. I gave it some thought and it is all via the internet these days. My mother is even on Facebook. Damn, that is convenient.

I had mentioned something to Pete that may help explain why I am preparing to embark on such a lengthy expedition. I told him that I would rather be killed in a foreign country than slowly waste away in the USA. It would be more interesting. Naturally, I hope that I am NOT killed in a foreign country but I think I have a risk no matter where I am. I am opting for adventure rather than a completely sedentary lifestyle. Not for everyone, I know.



BLOCKED BY MLK

I was going to work on getting some more stuff done for the trip with the bank and the VA clinic, but I was blocked by Martin Luther King's birthday. I had to look it up on line to know why nobody was answering their phones.



MICHAEL PALIN

Been watching a lot of travellogs by Lonely Planet and others by Michael Palin. I do like Palin's BBC documentaries though they only only show snippets of each of the places he visits on the shows I've watched. And he is not funny on it, but he does do the 'charming Englishman' well. Much better than YOU Matt! Wanker. By that, I mean "Matt is a wanker" if you are reading this Michael Palin. If Michael Palin is reading this it also means I've gotten a lot more funny and interesting than I ever thought I could get or Michael Palin is a lot more bored than I thought was possible.



CHATTING WITH AMY

For those who don't know Amy, she is a friend of mine I met long ago. I think she was 16 at the time. And I was like 30. Now, she has a baby named Elba (not mine) who I get in trouble for calling "baggage". Amy is a great gamer. One of her characters "Crazy Kara" still sticks around in my memory. Anyway, we've been friends for over a decade now. No, I don't know exactly how long as I think she stopped having birthdays in order to prevent any further aging. Seems to be working so who am I to point fault at it?

I started to go through what I think of the 'phases of parenting' with her but didn't get to complete them because little Elba got tired and had to be 'put down' - in Amy's terms. I'm guessing that she meant 'put him to bed' rather than 'make him feel bad by telling him he is a useless baby and such. Or shooting him. I figured I should specify that because we've got people from six countries that read this and people in New Zealand might not have any clue what I'm talking about.



PHASES OF PARENTING

So - the phases (as Logan sees it) of parenting. Disclaimer: Logan is a confirmed bachelor and likes not having any kids. I remember back in my twenties people would say "You're probably going to get married in the next year or two" When I got to my thirties they would say "Oh, some day, you'll find the right girl...". Now that I am in my mid forties, they shrug and say "Obviously, you were always meant to be a bachelor. Where the hell were these people when I was in my 20's and 30's telling people that? Don't mistake that I don't still have people telling me even these days about a story of two people in their forties who fell in love, hooked up and all of that. I always smile and tell them, "I have always made it a habit never to date or become involved with anyone with more mental problems than I have, hence I'm not worried about ever getting married." And that still doesn't get rid of them. Honestly, it makes you want to go borrow a fire hose. This lengthy disclaimer may have distracted you from the fact that we are going to get to the 'phases of parenting as Logan sees it'.


Stage 1: Fuck your social life.

In this phase, the kid is totally dependent up on you and guess what? Any friends you had? Gone. Hobbies you enjoyed? Gone. Time to yourself or with your significant other? Fucking gone. If your friends thought you became a dusch bag when you originally met up with this guy/girl/alien and never wanted to hang out with them anymore - here's a newsflash for them (and you) - you had TONS more hanging out with them back then. Now, that is GONE. Unless you are part of the less than 1% that can afford live in maids, ship the kid off to some parochial school that the kids in your family have gone to since time began and you remain blissfully unaware of their existence until they become more interesting - but I don't know any of those people on a personal basis. Now it is true that some people have so little going on with themselves that they have no hobbies, no real interesting parts of their lives that they are bland and this really helps out. Those people get hit very hard in stage 3. This stage is generally thought of as the 'baby stage'.


Stage 2: Unpaid Taxi Service.

I think my parents tried this until I was old enough to communicate that I really had no interest in any sports. I know that it is considered part of 'good parenting' to constantly drive them around (school events, sport events, etc) but dang - I owned a bike. I remember taking it to the baseball field on my own to participate in a pointless game when I was a kid. But, soccer moms and other people who want to live vicariously through their children will drive them endlessly around. This stage is 'as soon as they can demand you drive them to the park'. A lot of parents like this stage because in addition to wanting to (for some reason) live through someone else and forget about their own dreams left unfulfilled by onset (or surprise onset) of stage 1 the kid/kidlike being actually wants to hang out with you. "Mommy look at me!" is a common heard phrase. Not "Daddy look at me!" as he is often either slaving in the salt mines or has dumped the woman for someone younger/hotter/more male.


Stage 3: Abandonment.

Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You - and possibly your significant other/husband/wife. At this point, your son/daughter/artificial intelligence is working on a) distancing themselves from you b) creating their own identity c) rebelling d) fitting in with their peer group who is also trying all of the same crap but whose parents (according to your son/daughter/talking parrot is SO much cooler than you it makes him/her/it wish they could be adopted by other family. The sad thing is that if you check out the other family, yes, they are that much cooler than you. Despite all of the work you've done in stage 1 and 2, you suck. Sorry. The kid would like nothing better than for you to move out of the house and keep paying the bills. If you go into their room you will get more shit than when the USA foolishly invaded Afghanistan, Iran, Iraq and anywhere else we've stuck our noses into within the last decade. Some parents (read as 'abandoned refugees') will try to get back with the friends they had blown off back in phase one (or pre-phase one if they blew them off while dating). Some of the friends may be suckered back into getting together with the couple (or what remains of said couple) but many will get together with the ex-friend only long enough to realize that person has completely changed or they have no common interests left to discuss. News flash for those with kids - your single friends probably don't want to hear about them. Seriously. If they ask, just assume they are being polite and keep it brief. If they continue asking questions after the normal period, sure you can gush - but chances are excellent they won't. The only kids I personally am interested in are ones that I am related to (I have two nephews and one niece) but I am waiting till they get older and hopefully develop some more interesting hobbies. Like spear fishing. Or become adults - teens have very little to say and are usually mono-syllabic. Also - remember when you gave up your interesting hobbies back in Stage 1? You got a lot duller. You might be able to pick some of that back up. Most don't. I'm not sure why. It could be that they actually have to work at it. It could be that they have had some part of their brain broken by parenting. Not sure.


Stage 4: Money goes bye-bye.

This is usually for people rich enough to send their kid to college. These kind of people like to buy bumper stickers like it's some sort of badge of honor to be sending their kid to 'higher education'. My personal favorite is when they send their daughter to college for either a four or six year degree and she gets out of it - marries - and never works. That's just sad there. Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying "Investing in females getting any sort of education is a poor idea". Cynics may argue that is just because I don't want to get beating the crap out of by a bunch of highly educated women. To me, it just seems a hideous waste of time and money. I suppose it is theirs to waste. Some people will attempt to justify it by saying that going to four or six years of higher education makes a woman more qualified to produce babies. I'm not sure, but more power to them.


Stage 5 (optional): What - you still here?

I kind of think of this as the acid test for 'how has the parent done at making their child self sufficient. If the kid has come to live with you after they have gotten done with college (or high school if they take no college), you fail. People like to give lots of excuses and such but if your kid is living with you for say over a year after they are done getting 'educated' you have failed.


These are just an outsider's opinions on what he believes the phases are. Just because I am completely correct doesn't mean someone won't want to argue with me.




LONG TERM PLAN

See the green areas on this map? Try to stick to them - I should be able to afford those. Disability doesn't pay that much...



EXCELLENT PICKPOCKET ARTICLE

Here.