Logan's hospital adventure

One of the things they like to do when they are concerned about your heart is have you run on a treadmill to up your heart rate. This allows them to see much different stuff than when you're comfortable and at rest.

They took one look at my fat ass and said "Do you have trouble walking?" I said "Let us say I have a distinctive walk." They made the decision to inject me with chemicals. It was an uncomfortable hour.

The doctor then started saying that despite me passing the stress test he was wanting to give me some sort of groin test thing because I was having 'so much chest pain'. I asked him what the fuck he was talking about. He told me that was what was written on my chart. Apparently, the minor twinge I'd mentioned became the main reason I was in here. The high blood pressure that got me in initially seems to have been forgotten. Or perhaps it was not important enough to warrant me getting into the hospital.

After giving me a stress test and coming up with nothing, they decided they wanted to do another test. I told them "So long as the doctor advises it and it doesn't cost me anything, sure." After going away to verify it wouldn't cost me anything they came back and told me "There would be a small deductible."

I eyed the doctor and said "What's small?" He didn't know. I said "A couple grand could be 'small'." He agreed and now I'm waiting to get discharged. Yes, I could have just had it done and left the country but I'm attempting to leave no debts.

Being that I am a pain in the ass and saw no reason to wait for paperwork for two hours, I gave them a choice between me unhooking the wires and getting out of there quickly or them doing it. They chose to do it and I was out of there in half an hour.

I've never understood why they want to keep people in the hospital longer when it is obvious they aren't doing anything for the patient.

None of my problems were solved - my eye still hurts and my leg still has (apparently) poor circulation. All I got out of this hospital trip was different medicine - which could have been done over the phone. I think I'm going to try to stay away from doctors until I get to 'death's door'. I'm starting to develop Baron Munchausen's feelings toward doctors.

I had specified when I went in I authorized nothing that wasn't covered under my medicare. If they want to charge me anyway, find my ass in Kenya.

So I'm out of the hospital.